Sunday, April 04, 2004
I was watching F1 just now. Stupid Schumacher won again. Nothing new. What got me thinking is, in school, as Malaysians we were taught that national anthems are important songs that need respect. That means, when we hear Negaraku (literally means 'My Country'-Malaysia's National Anthem) we have to stand straight like a soldier. Cannot move. If got mosquito fly into your nose also cannot sneeze. If balls itchy also cannot scratch until the song over.
But noticing people from other countries, they treat their national anthems and other country's anthems like nursery rhyme. Schumacher always think he is an orchestra conductor when he hears the national anthem of Italy (for Ferrari). Move his hands up and down like a retarded boy trying to jerk off. Maybe they were taught in schools that national anthems were funny songs that you supposed to sing along and dance, like karaoke.
And speaking of schools and national anthem, we as Malaysians have to sing it every week in school when we have assemblies. Have to wear a ridiculous tie and stand under the hot sun. Followed by state song and then school song, then have to recite an oath. Waste of bloody time. Never understood the purpose of it, except that maybe we should be proud that all Malaysians knows the full lyrics to Negaraku.
In Form 5, my class was the top class in the school. Full of smart bastards, but all wise asses in their own ways. Smart people tend to make wonderful jokers and hence big time assholes. All the teachers who taught us really hated our guts despite us being the top students in the school. There was this BM (Malay Language) teacher whom we used to call Burung Pipit (Sparrow) Because she was short and fat. Bloody short woman. About 4 feet 10 inches tall only. Really. Although she was a nice lady, we still liked to piss her off.
Now, short people have short fuses. Doesn't take much to piss her off. One day, Dicky, the biggest asshole of all really pissed the fuck out of her. In retaliation, she ordered the whole class to stand on the fucking table. So there we go, the whole bunch of us, all grown up assholes forced to do a punishment that we hadn't done since primary school. Incidentally, that lesson was before our tea break, so as added punishment, she wouldn't let us go for tea break.
We were not happy. Our class was on the first floor and half the school will have to pass our class to go to the canteen for tea break or go to the library to hang out (library has air-cond and nobody goes there to read). Being rebellious geniuses, some wise ass decided that we should be proud of our predicament, so we drew open the curtains and opened the doors, so that half the freaking school could see us standing on the table. Our class full of top students. Full of top sportsmen. Our class which had prefects making up almost the entire Prefectorial EXCO (except the head prefect). And we were fucking proud about standing on the table for everybody to see.
Just then, another idiot, Charlie, decided that it would be a good idea, since we were standing and could not move, that we should rehearse for the coming week's assembly. So, with a lot of people outside our classroom looking and laughing at us, we decided that it would be funny to sing Negaraku. Very patriotic. All standing at attention. Had a face more serious that the Royal Guards. Singing Negaraku. Defiance at the highest order.
Burung Pipit was not impressed at our bleaming defiance. She stormed out of the class crying. Probably cursing and wondering what she did in her past life to deserve us. We were liberated!! We could now go for our tea-break and tell everybody about this incident. All because of Negaraku. The power of the national anthem eh?
Btw-this story is bloody real. We did a lot of stupid things in Form 5. More on other funny shit next day.