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Sunday, April 11, 2004

pringles

Pringles is the best damn junk food in the whole world. Twisties and doritos come close but pringles is the ultimate kick ass potato chip. Eat three tubes a week. Thats 3 pounds a week. Which works out to RM3 a day. Just on pringles. Never tasted another potato chip so bloody good in my life.

People say that junk food is bad for health. I don't understand why. Reading the Pringles bottle ingredients list:

1) Dehydrated Potatoes - Its potatoes without the water. What so unhealthy about that? I' ll just drink plenty of water after that.

2) Vegetable oil - When I was small, mum taught me that vegetables are good for health. So vegetable oil I presume has to be the same.

3) Flavourings

Under Flavourings:
1) Milk proteins - If milk is good for kids, its good for everybody.

2) Sugar - I don't take sugar in my coffee and tea, so this makes up for it.

3) MSG - I don't cook with MSG, so this makes up for it. Its good to have a balance.

4) Lactic acid - Not too sure about this. My science is a bit rusty. But I THINK theres a lot of this in the body of an ant. So if such a tiny creature can withstand this acid, it should be harmless to humans.

5) Citric acid - Very sure oranges have this. People say fruits = good. Orange = fruit. So, Citric acid = good.

6) Disodium Inosinate - What kind of pariah chemical is this? When they taught us Chemistry in school, they taught us a lot of dangerous chemicals. Have never heard of this before. Therefore, can't be that dangerous.

7) Disodium Guanylate - Another pariah chemical. Sticking to the theory that if I have not heard of it, then it must be ok.

8) Maltodextrin - Some kind of malt I presume. Whatelse is malt? Horlicks I think is called a malt drink. Horlicks is good for health as well. So if this maltodextrin thingy is some kinda malt, then it should be good for health too.

9) Wheat starch - Aaah. Finally something I know. Wheat = good. Starch = harmless. No problems here.

10) Emulsifier E471 - Wow! This chemical has a cool name. Comes with a serial number of some sort. Can't be that dangerous because if it was dangerous, they would call it Emulsifier XX444 or something like that.

11) Salt - Chey! How is salt bad for health? The sea water is damn bloody salty. All the fishes still alive. Don't say fish la. Even the mammals. Look at the whale. Big mother of a creature. Biggest mammal around. If he can grow so big living in salt water, then surely salt is good for health.

Who says junk food is bad for health? Okla. Maybe junk food like Keropok Mak Yati. Dunno how these village people fry their potato chips. But Pringles, as I have proven, is good for health. The morons who say that chips are bad for health are health freaks who don't know anything. Underweight, aneroxic women ask me not to eat too much chips cuz apparently chips make you fat. Nonsense. If it does make you fat, then they should eat more chips, cause they are so underweight, the wind can easily blow them away.

Warning : I am not a nutritionist. These are my theories. If you eat 10 bottles of Pringles at one go, and get a heart attack the next day, don't raise from your grave and haunt me. Pringles, like sex, is good for health but too much at one go can kill you.

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