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Thursday, May 06, 2004

objectives

Life.........and blogging has taught me many things about people. There always comes a time in our lives where we review our goals and objectives in life. I have had a long sit down to think about it but unfortunately, my concept of blogs doesn't permit me to let the whole damn world know what I am thinking about.

But during my long think, I also managed to list an A-Z of the types of homosapiens and their objectives in lives:

Ah Bengs : To make their cars, their handphones, and their hair look more colourful than a kid's colouring book.

Bimbos : To fight for animal rights, eradicate poverty and promote world peace while masked under 1 inch of mud cement makeup.

Children : To get 7As for UPSR, 12As for PMR and 19As for SPM by studying as much as possible and attending tuition classes at 8am on Sunday mornings because their parents told them that those exams are important when you want to get a job next time.

Dicks : To go out with as many women as possible at the same time, making it a challenge to ensure that those women don't find out about each other.

Elephants: To blind the entire human race and leave their minds permanently scarred by wearing as little cotton as possible hence exposing their celluloid infested fats flesh.

Faggots : To make their hands as smooth as possible, prefably smoother than their girlfriend's hand and to keep their skin as fair as possible with the use of an umbrella to shield the dangerous sunlight.

Geeks : To teach themselves C++ in one week, so that they can write a cheat code to be the best Counterstrike player in their hometown cybercafe

Hyenas : To laugh as loud as possible, so that other people know that they are clever and understood the joke, even if the joke wasn't really funny.

Indiana Jones : To show the world that they are macho and possess many physical capabilities, like being able to do push-ups 200 times and to do a one handed chin-up 20 times, although those things aren't really useful in life.

Jocks : To show everybody that contrarary to common perception, they do possess intellectual capabilities as they can actually count the number of trophies they have won.

Kukuciaos : To impress people and start random conversations with people just for the fucks of it by talking COCK and telling more elaborate lies than George Bush.

Loverboys : To spoil the market for the rest of the male species by being nice and acting deep and sensitive around women, when they are not.

Morons : To amuse the rest of the human population by doing things so incredibly stupid that only they alone are capable of.

*to be continued*

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