Sunday, June 06, 2004

feeling better now

I didn't post yesterday because I was not feeling alright.

Why not alright? Because I was temporarily half deaf.

Why half deaf? Because a bunch of horny sex deprived lunatic juvenile German and Dutch whores screamed into both my ears non-stop for around 2 hours.

I visited the London Dungeons. Its basically like a ghost house with scary exhibitions about the scary shits in the history of London. Here, when I mean scary shits, I don't mean the scary shits like my encounter with the ghost and the skeleton. I mean stuff like Jack the Ripper and torture chambers.

As we all know, every good "ghost house" would employ a few people to dress up in costumes, paint their face with tomato ketchup, and walk around trying to scare people. Now, scaring people requires either one of two things or both. First, you to take them by suprise. Like when you walk on the street one day with your mistress and from around the corner pops up your wife. You get shocked and scream.

Another way is to make them think they are going to get injured or die. Like when some crazy bitch accuses you of sleeping with her sister, and then she points a gun at your dick. You piss in your pants thinking that that would be the last duty your cock will perform and then you scream.

But I don't understand how scary it can be in a simulated "ghost house". Firstly, you already know that there are going to be people dressed up in ghost costumes just around the corner or behind the door waiting to jump at you when you pass. So, every corner you turn, you would expect something behind it. That eliminates the element of surprise.

However, there might be somethings that are really creative, like something dropping from the ceiling or popping from the ground. But, you very well know that it is not a real ghost house and hence no real ghost which can harm or injure you.

So why the fuck do you scream your fucking guts out?

Here's why. You see, I went back to my hotel room and since I couldn't watch much TV. I sat down and thought about the stuffs I noticed.

The facts:

1) The guys didn't scream.
2) They laughed.
3) 9/10 teenage girls scream.
4) One case, the girl was walking behind me, and a bitch in front started screaming. I couldn't see what it was about, but the moron behind me had X-Ray vision and could see through walls, and started screaming too, even though it was clear that she saw nothing.
5) In one of the rides, I heard the girl in front of me keeping mumbling, "OMG..Help me, help me"

My conclusion:

1) Those bloody teenage girls are attention seekers. By screaming, everybody turns and looks at them. They get to show people how ugly they are.
2) They have an inferiority complex. They think that by screaming, they can show the guys in their group that they are perfect girls -- emotional and very easily scared of things. Its true in real life, but as I said before, these exhibitions are nothing to be afraid of. And if you are really afraid, then don't go.
3) The girl asking God to help her in her time of "grave adversity" is missing a lot of screws.

Stuff I learned:

1) When entering a "Ghost House", never go in with a batch of crazy school girls.
2) Patience is the virtue, let them go in first, join the next batch.
3) In these kinda places, you need your eyes mainly, so stuff some chewing gum or something into your ears, so you don't get deaf.

Don't mess with crazy women. They can make you deaf.

P/S: London tube stations are fucking dirty.
Everytime I wipe my face the tissue turns black.
Everytime I blow my nose, the mucus is black.
Everytime I open my mouth, my tongue is still pink (thats normal la, did you expect it to be black? stupid ar?)

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