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Friday, November 12, 2004

camping in bus station, part 2

Ok, I don't really know how to write this, so I am going to go through each of those people one by one, and tell you how they irritated me on that night.

The German couple : Well, they didn't do much besides sleep. And talk loudly in German. The guy had a small moustach like Hitler. They were sleeping on the row of chairs behind me and kicked my chair a few times in their sleep. Should have poured some warm water down their pants.

Man with briefcase : I don't know what his problem is. He slept in the same position all night long. Didn't move a single bit. Not once. I thought for a moment that he died in his sleep. But then I learned that when people die, the crap in their pants. But I didn't smell anything, so I reassured myself that he was not dead. He didn't do much to piss me off except in the morning when he woke up.

He went to the toilet same time as myself and started shaving. In a fucking public toilet. I don't care what people do, but the other sink was spoilt, leaving one sink left. The cunt filled it up with water and took his own sweet time to shave. I had to wait 3 minutes for him to finish before I could wash my hands. Should have used his razor blades to circumsize him and shove the foreskin down his throat.

Nigerian guy : The most irritating fucker in the waiting lounge. For the simple fact that he was talking on the phone throughout the night with his girlfriend. Not that I have anything with people talking on the phone. But the problem is, these African people (and I know a few) they can't talk softly. This particular fucker decided that his girlfriend was as deaf as a snake. For 2 hours, he was basically talking loudly and advertising stuffs that I didn't need to know.

Stuffs like "Oh baby I miss you so much. I can't eat. I can't sleep just thinking about you." What a smooth talking bitchfaced snake. After 2 hours, the radiation from the phone had fried his already retarded brains, he finally put down the phone. No battery I reckon. Then he walked over the the public phone and called back his deaf girlfriend. And proceeded to boil phone porridge (poh tim wah chuk) for a subsequent 4 fucking hours. Holy shit man. He ended the phone call by making kissing sounds in the mouthpiece. Should have yanked out the receiver and continously banged it on his thick rhino hide skull.

Student + Hippie : The young guy, probably a student went over to the vending machine to get himself a cup of coffee. The hippie was already standing by the vending machines. Hippie felt lonely and needed a chat. The bastard was the second loudest guy in the room behind the Nigerian guy. He was trying to educate the student with fucken (he used that word a lot, and didn't seem to know how to pronounce it properly) conspiracy theories.

Theories like how Bush won the elections. Like how Bush got Blair to join the war. Like how the government takes homeless people on a ride. Basically a lot of bullshit. Scary thing is, he actually believed everything he said. Like as if the whole British government was trying to screw HIM over.

Hey you fuckhole. You are a hippie. The fucken government don't give a fucken rats ass about you. You scum hippie. He got scolded by the black security guard for sitting on the coffee table. And later proceeded to bitch to the student guy about how he thinks that the black guy only got his job because the government needed to keep black people off the streets.

Tramp bitch : Came in about 3am. Looked like she was going home after clubbing. Was half drunk and smoking some cheap trash rolled up cigarette. Then whipped out her handphone to call a friend. Topic of conversation was about her son. "I am relly worried about 'im. Too many girls. Too many girlfriends. He can do be'ter that dat. An his smoking too. I luv 'im loads, but he's breaking me heart."

Yes, yes, complain about how you are a good mother you are, bitch. Fucking go home at 4am, smelling of puke and cheap fag. What a fucking brilliant example you set to your son. Wake up and smell the cigars.

Homeless dude : Did nothing.Came in about 1am. Had a typical homeless person look. Dressed like that too. Slept the whole night through until 8am. Thats when the manager of the bus station came to work, banged on the chair next to him, and poked him until he got up. And then kicked him out of the place. Quite hilarious as he stumbled out of the waiting lounge, and walked to the side of the road, and lay there to continue with his nap.


Vincent's take on all this : Its not really a good idea to miss the last train out on purpose, regardless of whether you have a book with you. Scary stuffs out there.

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