Saturday, January 15, 2005

the buttockers

The buttockers, or otherwise known as The Butt Talkers are a breed of humans which are in abundance these days. The buttockers have no specific role in society, and actually prefer talking out of their backsides, for the amusement of the general public. After all, isn't it kinda funny to see people talk from their butts?

However, overexposure to buttockers can cause severe detriment to health. I have been unfortunate enough, over the last 8 hours or so to be exposed to 4 such buttockers. I shall tell you my story...before I get a seizure from banging my head against the wall too many times and subsequently pass out.

There are people who upon having nothing to talk about during a casual conversation, tend to divert their attentions to intellectual stuffs hoping that others will see them as knowledgable and well-versed in their surroundings. Two such buttockers showed their presence just now in front of a whole bunch of other people having dinner, nearly causing everyone of barf out their food :

Peter : I heard from my friend Abu that he can get marijuana here. He smokes it a lot too.

Jane : That's bad. I wonder whether its a crime to possess it in Singapore.

Peter : Dunno. I mean, its a Grade C drug. Different countries have different laws.

Jane : I know its legal in Amsterdam.

Peter : Haha. Of course, everything is legal in Amsterdam. But its banned in more conservative countries like Holland.

*Everybody stops eating and turns to look at Peter*

Jane : You just said its legal in Amsterdam.

Peter : So? Its illegal in other coutries, like Holland.

Jane : But Amsterdam is in Holland.

Peter : Oh. *activates coverline mode* Hehe. My geography of European countries is not very good.

Barely 5 minutes passed when.........

Jane : I am thinking of moving out next year to stay in Ancaster flats. I hear they are very nice.

Peter : But expensive, though.

*sidenote : Ancaster flats are the newest accomodation block in my uni. It is a pre-fabricated building, which means that the building parts were built in a factory, and put together on site*

Jane : Yeah, thats one thing. Another thing is I scared la. Pre-fab building leh. Don't know stable or not.

Peter : Should be okla. I mean I am sure the engineers know what they are doing.

Jane : I ask you to stay in a house built in a factory, you dare say or not.

Vincent : *can't take it anymore...about to open mouth*

Karen : Actually, a lot of modern housing projects and apartments are built like that.

Jane : But.....but....oh. You're a 4th year architect student. You should know.

Vincent : *no, dear. its not the matter of what you are studying*

*As a matter of interest to some people....both Peter and Jane are Lion Pretenders. (try saying it in Malay)

On the world stage, on today's news :

Care to shell out for this image of Christ?

GENEVA: After the revelation of a grilled sandwich allegedly bearing an image of the Virgin Mary in Florida last year, a bar manager in Switzerland said on Thursday he was ready to sell a Christ-like oyster shell.

Matteo Brandi, who runs a bar in the western Swiss village of Roche, told the Swiss newspaper Le Matin he came across the shell while opening a batch of oysters just over two years ago.

“When I tried to toss one of them away, it stuck to my hand. It wouldn't slip off my palm. Like He was calling me,” Brandi said.

The 38-year-old Italian, who says he is a devout Roman Catholic, is convinced the Picasso-like forms on the outside of the craggy oyster shell – held the right way up – represent the face of Christ.

Brandi said he had seen the light after a Florida woman auctioned off the grilled cheese sandwich last November for US$28,000 (RM106,400).

“This piece is unique. It is the work of nature. I shall try my luck over the Internet,” he added.

Brandi said he was waiting for offers, and was also thinking of telling the Vatican.

“They might be interested in it for the museum.”

The oyster's flesh however was eaten. – AFP

The 3rd paragraph really caught my attention. "Like He was calling me." Interesting.....

Calling you to do what? Make money at His expense over the Internet? Some calling indeed.... Although I must admit, the picture does look like Christ. However, another friend remarked that it looks like Papa Smurf.

Closer to home....

Help in mission to instill noble values, women urged
(exerpts of the article)

PUTRAJAYA: Women must help the Government realise its goal of instilling noble values in Malaysians.

The Prime Minister’s wife Datin Paduka Seri Endon Mahmood said members of Puspanita – the Civil Service Women’s Association – could play a prominent role in this.

“The Government has implemented various programmes towards enhancing the integrity of Malaysians. This is because it views seriously the task of enhancing noble values to ensure that negative habits will not destroy our next generation.

“In my opinion, Puspanita, whose mission is to make our women more competitive, knowledgeable and skilful, should play a prominent role in helping the Government realise this goal,” she said when launching the new Puspanitapuri building in Precinct 8 here yesterday.

Aaah.......I see. So men and children cannot help la? Neither can the cat and the goldfish, ok?

*I am about to bang my head against the wall. I see....stupid people....they are everywhere....they don't know they are stupid....help me...
* Personally, I think its pretty damn fun to pick a fight with buttockers.


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