Friday, February 18, 2005
a woman with balls
The 3 most common excuses :
1) Lose my dignity.
2) Will make me look cheap.
3) People won't respect me.
Mostly, they try to socialise in the same group as the person that they like. Go clubbing, try to dance in a group or something. Or work in some kinda societies thingy together. Social work, religious fellowship, stuffs like that. But I have never, NEVER seen an Asian woman, openly walk up to a cute guy and ask for his number.
Ok...I hear people screaming all over the place now. Women do pick up men. Yeah? How? When? Bars do not count - the setting encourages it anyway. Everybody goes to clubs expecting to be picked up anyway. Plus, alcohol can make you do wonders. Any place, or any activity which encourages chatting does not count either. You want a true measure of balls? Read on...
She had been noticing him for 2 weeks now. He comes into lectures, alone, always punctual. He sits somewhere in the middle row, smack in the middle of the screen in front. She watches as he unzips his bag, takes out his pencilbox, and removes a mechanical pencil. This guy - always writes with a pencil, never with a pen. Oh....he's left handed too, like me, she thinks.
She stares at his style, he fidgets in his seat a lot. He turns around, only to catch the stare in his eyes. She tries to flash a weak smile, but he had already turned his head. I shall dress nicer next week, she thinks. And dress she does, and they continue their little cat and mouse game.
This week, she is in luck. He gets on to the bus, and sees her already seated. There are no empty seats, except for the one next to her. He takes it like it is the most natural thing in the world. The silence would akward if they were not strangers.
They walk to the lecture hall together, only she walks ahead and he walks behind. She opens the first door, and leaves it open for him. Thank you, he says. She smiles. He walks ahead, and opens the next door for her. Thank you, she says. He smiles. As with the bus, the lecture hall leaves only two empty seats.
She passes him the lecture notes, and tries to conjure up her most provocative smile. Thank you, he says again. She hopes she wore enough perfurme today. He whips out his same old black pencil and starts writting again. When all is done, he starts packing up, ready to leave.
She delays. She hessitates. She contemplates. Then, without fear, without worrying whether she is pretty enough, or smart enough, she says :
"I was wondering.........would you like to..........................................."
I stared from afar, never really grasping the situation. I observed as she smiled and nodded at him. I sniggered as she stammered with her question, trying to be brave, trying to say what she wanted to say.
I smiled to myself as I walked out of that place. She suddenly became the most attractive woman in that room. That lucky bastard, I thought, its not everyday you meet a woman with balls......
some guys choose to leave their balls at home (being chicken) or somewhere else, so it's understandable if women chose not to make the initial move. but if they do, which doesn't suprise me, can do a better job than men. that's why most men still listens to their mother.
munkit : that....and if everybody could think like me. same effect, better world to live in
stan : the guys who leave their balls at home are not worth my mention.
keng : no..of course not. is your screen resolution set to 1024x768?
Oh about the blog thing, I had the same problem, sometimes my posts comes after the sidebar.. and sometimes it looks fine on my comp but it looks disjointed in others comps.
Your blog looks fine on my screen.
alynna : AWESOME! haha...thats because you should NEVER catch somebody off-guard.
You were so mean to the girl-lar!
It probably took her every single ounce of courage to do what she did and you were "snigger"-ing at her!
waterjunk : i think we all admire girls like that
But speaking from personal experience, it's not easy to gather the guts to go up to the guy and ask him out.. My personal experience: I've done that quite a number of times but unfortunately, have always been rejected. :( Sighh.. what can I say? Not good enough? Oh well..
Having said that, I don't think my past experiences are going to stop me from continuing to go after the guy that I want.. Girl power??(Though I think my bf will be the one stopping me from doing that.. :P )
that made me swear never to make the first move.
that and the fact that i have never seen a female-initiated relationship work.
don't guys get a kick out of doing the chasing and winning the girl? wouldn't depriving them of that kick be the death of any potential relationship? i think there may be some kind of double standard here. would you REALLY appreciate a girl more if she made the move instead of you?
We all are afraid of rejection. I'm not saying that men are immune to it either. Actually, not all women wait for men to make the first move. I'm Asian (last time I checked) and I asked my boyfriend out on a date.
To be fair, we were friends. Best friends actually. I wanted to take the friendship to another level and was hoping that he does too. That was really nerve-wrecking. Seriously.
I think that it's in the culture where women are supposed to be timid, docile and fragile creatures which rarely speak up. Except maybe to go to the toilet. In packs.