Tuesday, March 28, 2006

a bowl of rotten rojak, part 2

When I wrote Part 1, someone questioned the statistics of the said article. I could not put a link to that article on the NST because it was already older than 7 days and I have no access to the older archives. However, Mack wrote a related post on this issue and from there, I found a link to the mentioned article. Do take your time and read through it.

2 in 3 don't understand other cultures

Hari Raya Puasa was wrongly perceived as the Malay new year by
32% of Malays
84% of Chinese
45% of Indians

Chinese New Year was wrongly perceived as a religious festival by
57% of Malays
62% of Chinese
53% of Indians

Deepavali was wrongly perceived as the Indian new year by
53% of Malays
86% of Chinese
28% of Indians

I've actually written an interesting piece about this. We pride ourselves to be a muti-cultural society, yet many of us (myself included) are ignorant with regards to other people's cultures. Looking at the statistics, you could say that Indians and Malays are pretty much similar, with an average of 49% of Indians and 54% of Malays wrongly perceiving a celebration which was not their own. However, nearly double that - a shocking 85% of Chinese wrongly perceived a celebration of another race. But the Chinese also scored a high (or low!) of 62% of them not even understanding their own celebration! Are we so engrossed into our businesses and trying to 'beat the Malays' that we forget our own culture? And on a more general view, are we kidding ourselves by saying we are a multi-cultural society when we are in fact ignorant to the most basic characteristics of the other races?

1 of 2 do not trust other races

The stereotype that 'in general most Malays are lazy' holds true for
58% of Malays
63% of Chinese
43% of Indians

The stereotype that 'in general most Chinese are greedy' holds true for
71% of Malays
60% of Chinese
47% of Indians

The stereotype that 'in general most Indians cannot be trusted' holds true for
64% of Malays
58% of Chinese
20% of Indians

Do not confuse this with saying "Yes, all Malays are lazy." I think it was made very clear in the survey that it is a general stereotype. Of course not all the people of a certain race follow the stereotype - that goes without saying. But stereotypes exist for a reason - most people believe they are true.

The Chinese are a pretty consistent bunch here. We rate pretty equal, even in critisizing ourselves. The strongest 'critisism' (for the lack of a better word) comes from the Malays to the Chinese and the 3rd highest percentage comes from the Chinese with regards to "Malays being lazy". Could it be that a serious distrust exists between the two races? (Funnily enough, I have had countless numbers of Chinese critisizing the Malays on this blog, but not one of the opposite).

And perhaps the most interesting of the lot - the Indians are probably the most tolerant amongst us all, with the lowest percentage of them subscribing to the stereotypes. Heck, only 20% of them believed their own stereotype that "Mosts Indians cannot be trusted". Many friends have commented on the irony of that statistic.

However, I would like to take it as a good sign - they are a tolerant bunch, certainly one that we can learn from. Another thing about not believing your own stereotype is that it makes you strive to get rid of it. You hate that you are stereotyped in that manner and therefore would not do anything that reflects that stereotype. It is for that reason that I find the Chinese and Malay acceptance of their stereotype (60% and 58% respectively) extremely worrying for that probably means they admit to it and therefore aren't doing much to shed that image.

Statistics like these are probably not very accurate, yet they do give a good indication of what is wrong with us. Statistics like these beg to be interpreted by many different people - each with their own views.

This is mine, and I have asked many questions but left them unanswered.

What is yours?

*I do not wish to land myself in jail, so any baseless comment with a slightest hint of racism would go straight into the bin*


Sunday, March 26, 2006

a bowl of rotten rojak, part 1

The NST published a very interesting article the other day filled with statistics of all sorts. They commissioned an opinion poll on ethnic relations where 1113 people above the age of 20 were surveyed.

The 'good' statistics:
92% enjoy Malaysia's multi-racial nature
90% are proud to be Malaysian
78% have friends of other races
76% say government policies help integration
61% say ethnic relations are good
55% say Chinese and Indians are not second-class citizens

The 'bad' statistics:
42% don't consider themselves Malaysian first
46% say ethnicity is important in voting
55% blame politicians for racial problems
70% would help their own ethnic group first

I chose to present the statistics to you in that manner, without any comments under them because I wished for you to read them with an open mind, unbiased by my comments, and let your opinions be forged by your mentality in which you grew up in and your experiences that moulded your interpretation of those statistics. I think it a travesty that the NST did not actually disect the rather interesting bits of that survey, although it was probably for a reason that we all understand. Nevertheless, we all have our own stand on it...and this is mine.

On the 'good' statistics...

I have two main critisisms here.

78% have friends of other races

It pretty much depends on how you define a 'friend'. If a friend is someone you know at school or at work, then unless you are a hermit, anybody who has spent their whole life in Malaysia would invariably have friends of other races. Everybody has friends of different races. Question would be....how close? Someone you hang out with everyday? Your best friend? Your mamak kakis? Unfortunately, the occurance of such a strong bond between two different races is very rare.

55% say Chinese and Indians are not second-class citizens

I digress here - a figure of 55% is far too low to be considered a 'good' statistic. It would mean that 45% of people consider themselves 2nd class, and surely that is not a good statistic for racial harmony? I remember Mahathir being asked once on a live interview on BBC by a Malaysian Chinese woman saying that she felt like a second class citizen in Malaysia because of our policies. His response was simple, yet powerful. "Ask the Malay driver who drives his Chinese boss around whether he feels like a second class citizen". I reckon that point holds true in many areas. You will NOT find a single Chinese driver, not a single Chinese road sweeper or garbage collector, and you will be hard pressed to find a Chinese rubber tapper. Being second-class is really nothing more than a matter of perspective. That said, if an Indian did complain about being second-class, I wouldn't brush that away as easily.

On the 'bad' statistics...

42% don't consider themselves Malaysian first

This is a problem I have been nitpicking at for ages. We are probably one of the few people in the world who respond to the question of "What are you?" with our race and not our nationality. I know of many people who get offended when foreigners refer to them as Malays (as they assume that people from Malaysia are called Malays just as people from Germany are called Germans). In actual fact, the non-existance of a Bangsa Malaysia is something that I believe the government should take the brunt of the blame.

46% say ethnicity is important in voting
55% blame politicians for racial problems

I find these two statistics contradicting each other. How can we blame politicians for playing racial politics when we vote people based on the colour of their skin? Many a Chinese has complained that we will NEVER see a Chinese Prime Minister, but is that not as racist to demand that you want to see a Prime Minister's skin colour when in fact you should be looking at the man's capability instead?

70% would help their own ethnic group first

This is perhaps the most worrying of the statistics, although I would say that it is not surprising. Many a time you hear of a Chinese or Indian complaining that they have no chance of making it big in a Malay company. However, I personally know of Chinese bosses who immediately bin any job application by a Malay. Perhaps it is a form of retribution, or perhaps they feel they are equalling the chances. I have a better explaination for that.

I will no doubt be considered naive by many people who claim to have eaten salt all their lives, but this is my stand and one which I believe is true. I have already established the fact that most people do in fact hang out with members of the same race - be it at work or socially. It is also human nature to help someone you are friends with. It may be called croynism, but I do not believe for one moment that any of us would prefer to help an acquiantance over a friend if the situation permits us (for example if they are of equal capability), And it is for that reason, since the head honcho of a Malay company would be a Malay, then he would feel happier to promote his early morning nasi lemak buddy. And of course, the same would apply to a Chinese company.

Someone the other asked me what I consider a racist behaviour. Someone else asked me whether I considered myself one. Honestly, I don't know the answer to either of the questions. What I do know is I TRY to keep an open mind about things. When people tell me not to work for a Malay company because I 'can't get far', I brush it off. I TRY to be less suspicious of other races. I TRY to see things from the perspective of the Malays (and the Indians) and I TRY to understand their actions. And that, my friends, is good enough for me.


Thursday, March 23, 2006

you akan terasa

What ever the hell happened to only speaking when you have something constructive to say?


Wednesday, March 22, 2006

a rojak bowl

I am working on a particularly long piece on racism, inspired by the NST article a couple of days ago. I will come out with the full list of statistics tomorrow after I am done analysing them. But just a quickie to help me out for my research:

Create polls and vote for free. dPolls.com

There are five options for you to choose from my question of 'Exactly how racist do you think you are?' I've just learnt this poll thingy is a little stupid. It displays the top 4 options only...you have to move your cursor over the arrow by the side plus they can't display the whole question if it is a little too long. But anyways, help me out a little, will you?


Sunday, March 19, 2006

defending the indefensible

Someone once told me that I chose the wrong profession. I should have been a laywer, she said. Apparently, I have the uncanny ability of being able to defend the most guilty of criminals and the most shocking practises which most people frown upon.

The mantra is simple. It's not about agreeing with the action of the person or agreeing with the policy. The important thing is to understand the situation and to understand why people act as they do. And seriously folks, once you do that, you can even defend Hitler's actions.

So anyway, during a particularly slow day at the office just the other day, I sat down and started thinking of a bunch of indefensible stuffs and give a go at trying to be a lawyer defending those stuffs. Of course I do not actually agree with the following situation, but I managed to stupefy myself by successfully defending it.

Before I start with presenting you the situation and risk the chance of you getting all biased and not paying attention to any of my arguments, I am going to start by asking you a few questions which you will of course answer honestly. And then I'll drop the scenario on your toes and you will go, "Yo Vincent! WTF MAN?!?!"

Alritey then, what would you consider an acceptable level of public displays of affection?

Holding hands? Kissing? Gropping? I did a fair bit of research and asked a few people what they thought about it. As expected, the answers varied. Some people thought kissing was ok, but only limited to a peck on the cheek, while others thought the lips was alright. Personally, I think a hug would be ok but kissing should be left in the privacy of your house (or car!). And of course there are old-fashioned people like some of our parents who seem to think that anything more than a mere holding of hands is considered 'indecent'. Everybody I asked said that they think frenching and gropping in public is disgusting, but I have seen people do that so I think those guys are ok with it.

Ok, now that we have established that everybody has different levels of tolerance, the next question is.....what do we do when people breach our level of accceptable behaviour? TWO people said that they would mumble amongst themselves when their friends cross the line. Most people, and myself included, would not hessitate to shout out, "OI! GO GET A ROOM DAMMIT!" I think it is safe to say that 90% will do the same when our friends cross THAT line.

So, established FACTS:
1) All of us have different tolerence levels
2) Most of us would scream when people cross that line

Which brings me to my scenario.

You know the stories we hear about the JAIS guys and the security guards in shopping malls who go around scolding couples who kiss and hold hands in public?

Are their actions justified?

Of course NOT Vincent! WTF MAN!? How can you justify the actions of moral police?

But wait a minute. Didn't we already agree that everybody has different tolerance levels? And did we not agree that it was quite a normal thing to voice our displeasure when people act 'inappropriately'?

YES! But these idiots go around berating people for merely HOLDING HANDS!

So what? To them, holding hands is past their tolerance level. You and I say, "It's ONLY holding hands! It's not as if we are french kissing in public!" But then those people who DO french kiss in public will shout, "It's ONLY french kissing! It's not as if we are having sex in public!"

So are you saying it's even right to have sex in public?

No, you moron. Having sex in public is against the law. Besides, I never said any of this was right. It's a matter of perception and moral ethics. There are no rights and wrongs here. So as long as we scream at people to "GO GET A ROOM!", then we are no different from those JAIS folks.

Aah, yes Vincent. You are right...in a totally fucked up way....

Yes I know. Sometimes I scare myself with the power my logic. I should have been a lawyer. I think I am ready to defend Saddam.


Wednesday, March 15, 2006

congratulations, you....

I guess the million dollar question behind this whole farce of SPM results is fairly obvious. How on earth is 15A1's better than 15A1's + 1A2? I suppose it is a question that highlights the utter nonsense of this annual worshipping of 'geniuses'.

I started off wanting to bash the three of them, but I realized that I would be doing no better than to repeat my points from last year. For your benefit though, I shall roughly scheme through some of those points. For instance, all of them did Basic Science when they did Physics, Chemistry and Biology. Basic Science is a subject done by students from the Arts Stream. It is nothing short of pointless and downright 'kiasu' to do a basic subject when you are at the same time studying a subject of a higher level. And sticking to subject choices, what was that 16A Chinese girl doing Tasawuur Islam?

We would all like to think that these kids spent their time nicely and managed to have fun enjoying their childhood. SPM was something we all went through. It is not logical to say that kids these days are smarter than the days of "let's worship the guy who got 8A's." We have all known our fair share of geniuses in our time, and no matter how smart they were, we all know that getting 10A's in our time would require a superhuman feat, no less.

That brings me to wonder...how much exactly are kids these days studying? There is enough time to be a zombie when we start working, slogging day and night to bring in some dough, but surely the line has to be drawn when it comes to teenagers? Should we not allow them to enjoy their youth and leave the slogging up to the adults?

Too often have I seen the over-achievers in school get into university or get into the workforce totally burnt-out, a shadow of their former self. They end up partying like wild animals and somehow do not work with the same exuberance they showed in school. Why the burn out? Why did they pressure themselves to excel? More importantly, why did we pressure them to excel? Of course it would be preposterous to be suggest that they should have played around and not have a single responsibility in the world, and play around till they flunk all their subjects. Yet, there has got to be a line of moderation drawn somewhere - the line that separates sensibility in studying and sensibility in playing.

On this year's issue, where all the newspapers as well as the MoE happily boast of a 43% increase in straight 1A students, not only is their action encouraging such high levels of unhealthy competition at such a young age, that statistic is ridiculously misleading.

Let's start by bashing the statistics, shall we?

To be honest, when I first read the papers of the 43% increase, I was muttering curses beneath my breath. Does that mean that kids last year are 43% smarter than the previous year? Rubbish. Does that mean that the standard had dropped? Maybe. Should we get all excited about it? Definately not. But then it occured to me to do a little research before I start with the bashing. Thank heavens I did.

As you can see, the announcement of the supposed 43% increase is nothing more than the MoE blowing it's own trumpet just to please the public. Well, of course there would be a sharp increase in the number of students with straight A1's, since there are more than 20 000 more candidates last year compared to the previous year! Yes, there was an increase in the percentage of straight A1 students, but only by a mere 0.06%

It then brings me to wonder, why show off the supposedly great results when in truth, they aren't much greater than last year? I think it has a lot to do with the public demands. Why do we laud top scorers? So what if they got 15A's or 17A's? Yes, we should pat them on the back, but why should we worship them as heroes? It is that sort of attitude that causes kids to attempt suicide when they get bad results.

And of course sometimes the kids probably have no choice but to get all those A's because most of the time, that is what dictates who gets the scholarship and who doesn't. At last knowledge, co-curicular activities only count for 10% of the criteria, and no matter how hard people deny it, there is a very direct link between straight A scorers of today with their inadequate skills in other areas. Just the other day, a good student, a qualified engineer, was so nervous during an interview that he blurted out "Tekanan = Isipadu divide by area". Of course, when these guys don't get their scholarship despite their many A's they then scream bloody murder.

I have never liked our system of education. Many people call me a government lover, and while that may be slightly true, I hate the MoE with a vengence. I could expand this article by another 5000 words but would still fail to cover every single fault within the system.

Firstly, the SPM format and syllabus is way outdated. It does not encourage students to think, but to mug, because after all, mugging and not thinking yields the best short term result. With that mugging system in place, it is extremely easy for an experienced teacher to 'spot' questions just by analysing the papers from the past few years. There is not a single student out there now who can tell me that they never heard of a 'tip' for SPM that didn't come out.

It is also a fact that large tuition centres especially here in the Klang Valley conduct large seminars just before SPM to 'sell their tips'. This practice was rampant when I sat for my SPM in 2000, and it is even scarier to think how common a practice it is these days. Of course, back then, I defended my actions as 'studying smart' instead of 'studying hard'. Thinking back now, 'studying hard' and 'studying smart' is essentially the same lie. We study to gain knowledge. We study because we have a passion for something. When we learn about the body's digestive system, we do so because we want to know what happens after we have dinner. We shouldn't learn about it because we know the exam will ask us to name the acid we find in the stomach. Studying for exams is a concept that should be made foreign to students.

The grading system doesn't work either. Every year the MoE releases statistics that mention the increase (or decrease) in the percentage of A's and percentage of failures in a particular subject. Statistics like those are misleading and only serve to fool people into believing that results of that particular year have improved. The idea that "70% gets you an A, 60% gets you a B" is an extremely flawed practice.

Two things essentially determine the grade of the student. First is of course his score. There is no exact figure to get an A, but it is known to be around 70%, but that figure can be raised or lowered depending on various other factors. I could make an uneducated guess and say that they might lower the bar if the paper was a little too tough but as those factors are only known to the MoE, I shall stop at that. In other words, the MoE can decide whether they want to lower or raise the bar for a particular subject for a particular year and we would be none the wiser. Crudely, it is possible to say then that the results are 'rigged'.

Another factor would of course be the level of difficulty of the paper itself. While they do moderate the papers to be of a certain standard of difficulty, there is not an institution in the world who can set exam papers and say for sure that the 2003 paper is of the exact same level of difficulty as the 2004 paper. You may argue that that is why the practice of 'raising or lowering' the bar is put into place. However, I cannot begin to imagine how it is possible to judge the magnitude of which that said bar is adjusted. Besides, if we really wanted to promote a healthy competition between the students, they should be competing against each other and not against a system.

Therein lies a very interesting marking system which I heard off from an Indian (from India, doh) lecturer in college. Under this system it is not necessary to moderate papers to match the level of difficulty from the previous year, nor is it necessary to adhere to the syllabus as rigidly as we do now. The idea is to set a paper, no matter how easy or hard it may be and the students go about with their exam. The MoE (in the case of the SPM, or the teachers in the case of an ordinary school exam) would then decide how many students they want to score A's. This figure would of course be a set figure (top 10% to get an A, bottom 10% to get an F for example) and be used in every exam.

This means that we pre-decide the number of A's we get every year. Under this system it is not possible for a student to complain 'this paper was sooo tough!' for it would be possible for a student to get 30% in a difficult paper but get an A for it because he fared better than his 90% of his peers. Similarly, it would be possible to get 80% for a ridiculously easy paper and yet only manage a C. I am not championing this system, it has flaws like the current one - but I believe it is more efficient and more fair.

I do know this however. SPM is only an entrance key to college and university. No amount of A's will ever give you the social skills you require to survive in the real world. And certainly, no amount of A's will ever buy you back the childhood that you lost.

If you are one of the few morons who chanced upon my blog over the last few days looking for 'JPA scholarships' in Google, let me be the first to inform you that this is NOT the JPA website and you cannot apply for your scholarships here. But since you kids of today are so spoonfed in your education, I shall hold your hand (and shove a pacifier down your throat) and guide you to the official JPA website.

However, since you couldn't tell the difference between a blog and a government website, a word of advice to you....don't bother.


Monday, March 13, 2006


Hari tu, I jumpa sama member I kat kilang tempat kerja. So I tanya dia, "Eh Mat, nak minta tanye, ko punya motor isi minyak...berapa you kena bayar?"Lepas tu, dia kasi tau...sebenarnya, tak banyak. Tangki penuh dulu RM6, skrang lepas naik harga baru tujuh ringgit lebih.

Lepas tu I tanye dia...satu bulan berapa kali kena isi? And then dia bagi tau, biasanye lima atau enam kali. Maksudnya satu bulan dia kena bayar RM7 atau RM8 lebih banding dengan dulu.

"Gomen naik harga you tak marah ke?"

"Tak la...naik harga memang kena naikla kan. Baca newspaper pun tau mah..dia orang cakap tak cukup minyak."

"Susah makan tak?"

"Alaaa...tujuh lapan ringgit tu apa? Biarlah dua hari tak keluar makan masak maggi...dah kira ok mah"

Maka, sudahlah I dapat tahu, orang-orang yang asyik merengek tu bukanlah orang yang 'miskin' bawa motor. Sebenarnya, orang yang merengek tu adalah mamat-mamat berkepala buto yang ada gaji yang stabil tetapi tidak tahu dan mungkin tidak mahu merancang pembelanjaan mereka dengan baik.

Minta maaf, ye...sebab I dah tak ikut janji. Tapi, biarlah perkara ni tenang dulu......barula I berbelog pasal benda lain. Misalnya, surat khabar besok tentu akan ada top scorer SPM semua. Kalaulah ada 'moron' seperti tahun lepas, tak habis habis I cerita pasal dia kat korang semua.


Sunday, March 12, 2006

a clean slate

A few days ago, I heard an inspiring, if not down right whacky story. Of course, things like that happen for a reason. If you ask them religious blokes out there, they will attribute it to a higher power (and one with a very bad sense of humour, I might add) rewarding you to balance out some karmic forces of some sort. If you ask me, I think stuffs like that happen to get you to recontemplate how you live, or in this case, how you deal with adversities.

I wrote something I truely believed in. As far as that goes, I have always done that from day one. And for that, I offer no apologies. But after the aforementioned story, chats with countless people and a couple of emails, I realised that my readership had all this while appealed to sensible people, young or old regardless. I am thankful and very much prefer a readership of 300 sensible people who read my views, sit back and contemplate those views and most of the time keep their opinions close to hand than a legion of 800 fanbois who stick with me blindly.

I have learnt that 'maturity' is a silly concept, for who are we to judge whether someone is mature or not? We call someone matured and rational if they succumb to our way of life and have the same mentality as us. Or is it all a matter of age and no less? For I have seen jobless middleaged people bumming around leeching off others, but no one would call a 40 year old man 'immature', the same way no one seems to call a 35 year old man who ditched work to take to the streets 'immature'.

The sarcasms and the twisted humour will continue, as will the occasional 'social commentary' posts for that is still very much ME. Taking either of those topics away from this blog would be hypocritical, for they are not ME. Yet, if there is room for improvement, it would be the total avoidance of replying to morons the same way I did in the last few posts (damn I just called them morons! Bad Vincent!)

But seriously, I may say all this, yet be human again when the next troll comes along and react badly but I again offer no apologies to that. However, that is my goal and we shall see what happens...


Friday, March 10, 2006

fish bait

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I appreciate the fact that many of you reading this only started reading my blog since that ridiculous debate. However, less you go on further making a complete fool of yourself, there are two things you should really know about me.

1) I live and breathe sarcasm. It is my forte the same way camwhoring is other people's.
2) I make a living taking the piss out of people.

And since I take it that most of you are n00bs, I'll be nice this time and explain something to you. For example, if I write something totally bohliao like yesterday's post, that means I am setting bait for unsuspecting labi-labi to bite.

And boy did you suiyu bite and bite hard....

Lemme ask you though, how is it possible to read something like that and really take it seriously, and with all the italic words at the right places too?? Really guys, how does it feel to be a rocket scientist?

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tongue in cheek

I can't believe that I had for just one small moment the other day doubted whether I was indeed as awesome as I thought I was....

Events of today convinced me that I am not just awesome, I am fucking brilliant. And heck, I am ONLY 21, you know.

Come on kids, worship your king!

(if you really do know me outside the cyberworld, feel free to buzz me and I will happily brag about how I saved the world from catastrophy today)


Tuesday, March 07, 2006

of eating chillies

A baboon and a hyena were walking side by side in a mushy swamp. Of course, you would be wondering, how it is possible that a jungle baboon and hyena from the savannahs got together in the same place, let alone a swamp? I could tell you a long story of how an evil Sang Kancil forced them to be, but then you would be wondering how the hero Sang Kancil turned evil.

Cutting straight to the chase, the baboon and hyena who weren't vey good friends in the first place, decided that they would let each other be as they carried on their own business in the swampy swamp. We should cue the suspense button here, but since there isn't a suspense button in the swamps, we shall just go on to say excitedly, "SUDDENLY......the baboon chanced upon abunch of bright red chillies."

Of course, some of the more astute of you will be thinking, "Chillies don't come in a bunch..." Then of course, a fewer number of your smart guys out there would be thinking, "Never mind about the bunch, what the hell are chillies doing in a swamp??" However, only the sharpest of you lot would realise that there is nothing unusual about a bunch of chillies in a swamp since none of the earlier stuffs made sense anyway.

And the baboon, being a baboon, decided to make a monkey out of himself. He took the whole bunch of bright red chillies and stuffed it all into his mouth at once. If there is one thing that is completely unusual about this story, it is the fact that nothing unusual happened here. As you would expect, the baboon, upon shoving the chillies into his mouth jumped with glee (yes, this part IS unusual) and started cursing in a million languages. He tries to spit all the chillies out but his tongue continued to burn for ages long. Terrified, yet enlightened with his new unpleasant experience, after the burning sensation had subsided, he turned to the hyena and said, "Go on mate, have some" as he pointed to the mushed up pulp of chilly that he had just regurgitated.

Yes, you might find some chilly munched on and spit out by a baboon the most disgusting thing you have ever seen, but to the hyena it was nothing unusual. The hyena however wasn't having any of it. "I've seen how hot it is, I think I'll pass..." The selfish baboon, trying to inflict suffering upon his companion said, "Yes, it is hot, but you won't know how hot it is until you've tried it. Siapa makan cili dialah yang terasa pedas, tau tak?"

(If you are wondering where the baboon had suddenly learnt BM from, then you have an IQ comparable to a watermelon, and it would be advisable to leave now, less you damage your brains any further)

The hyena, not impressed by the baboon and his sob stories, retorted back, "My tongue may not know how it tastes, but my eyes saw you jumping around in agony, my ears heard you screaming in pain, and my heart bled when I saw and heard all that. After all that, I do not need to eat the chilly to know that it is a vile fruit"

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Monday, March 06, 2006

mending my boat

So one day, on a particular given day when the sky was as grey as grey could be, and the sun was as hidden as hidden could be, an old fisherman was standing over his half broken boat while looking towards the sea. Of course, we would never know what he was really thinking, but one could look into his eyes and make an uneducated guess that perhaps he was worried that his boat was not seaworthy in such treacherous conditions.

As the story would have it, young village boy was to stroll along the beach just at that precise moment. As he watched the old man mumble about the state of his leaking boat, he walked up to the fisherman and asked, "Sir, why don't you mend your boat so that you can take it out to sea to catch fish?"

"How do you propose I do that?" the fisherman retorted.

"Well, you could sell some of your belongings. The chain around your neck should fetch a few coins you know," the young boy suggested.

"Tell me, young man, why should I give up something that has been a precious belonging of mine for years?" demanded the obstinate fisherman.

"A small sacrifice for the greater good, SIR" scoffed the arrogant boy.

"Sacrifice? Kid...I have in my life eaten more salt than you have eaten rice. I just had salt for breakfast!. You know nothing about eating salt, so don't give me advice about sacrifices, punk."

"But sir," the boy asked, "if salt is as unpleasant as you say it is, then why do you still insist on having it for breakfast when you could have mended your boat and gone out to catch fish?"

The old man and the young boy stared at each other, both failing to understanding why the other was being as obstinate and as arrogant as they were, both adamant that they were right.

"Young man, one day, when you grow up and have eaten as much salt as I have, then you will understand why I complain about the boat. "

"Ah, good sir, I assure you, if salt as is horrible as you describe it to be, then I have no intention of tasting it. And I assure you, I will make sure I won't have to.."

"YOU WILL! It is inevitable!" screamed the old man.

The young boy, refusing to argue with the obstinate old man, turned around and walked away.

"Where do you think you are going, kid?"

"I am off to mend my boat..." the kid answered, ".......before it starts leaking."

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Slyvester : you know what your selling point is?

Vincent : what?

Slyvester : you're 21 and you make a shit load of noise...people aren't used to that.

Vincent : So what? If they agree with you, you are a child genius. Otherwise you are an immature tin kosong...double edged sword you know...

Slyvester : But that's how stuff works...you are still one of the more popular 21-year old bloggers out there....

Vincent : Nola. Got that stupid bimbo. She also femes wat..

Slyvester : Which one?

Vincent : Neh that famous one...clever to post pics of herself but no content one..

Slyvester : Which one la??

Vincent : You fucking blur la...Neh that woman you go her site first thing you see she greet you big big picture..

Slyvester : knnccb...WHICH ONE!?!?

Vincent : You damn idiot.....the one where horny perverts like you go to see pretty face only...

Slyvester : Machauhai............GOT TWO OK!?! Which one you talking about?

Vincent : Oh yeah hor!!!....hahahahahaha..

Slyvester : Ironic, huh? The way they both hate each other so.....


Saturday, March 04, 2006

let's educate the masses

Let's have a little lesson in economics, finance, business or whatever mumbo-jumbo it is called these days. I find it very ironic that I am giving lessons in finance when I miserably failed Financial Management and Corporate Finance in university. Oh yes, they force engineers to study that crap too, you know.

But fuck it, we don't need to have studied rubbish like that in university or in school to have a COMMON SENSE. Firstly, in order to spend money, that money has to come from somewhere. You idiots complain that the public transport is horrible, the education system dismal and the healthcare abysmal. However, when the goverment tries to raise money for precisely all that, you grumble to wit's end. So pray tell me, where the fuck do you expect all that money to come from? Would you prefer they raise the income tax rates, or are you praying that gold shall rain down from the heavens??

And on to more complex matters....

You question why it is not possible to raise the prices in small increments. It is of course possible, but as you all saw last year, everytime the fuel prices increased, not only did you idiots make noise all the time, prices of everything else also jumped up. This causes uncertainty because everybody - consumers, traders, investors do not know when the next hike would be.

Rule number 1 of business. Risk is bad. Nobody likes risk. Uncertainty equals risk. Therefore, the higher the risk, the higher the expected return. In other words, when there is uncertainty in, goods will be sold at a much higher price - not at all proportionate to the hike. And that is just for common traders. If you look at a bigger picture, investors do not like throwing money into an uncertain market where a sudden price hike will leave them staring at a prospect of a big loss.

Hence, by raising the prices as they did, the government could assure everybody that there would not be anymore price hikes for the whole year - thus eliminating the uncertainty in the market and the risk element that nobody likes.

You know the most ironic thing about this whole thing? When you ask most Chinese about their thoughts on the NEP, they will tell you that the Malays should stop depending on the government for help. Funny then, that those same people demand that the government continue helping them so that they can live in their nice little comfort zone of theirs.

And on to the moronic demonstration this afternoon. When I first heard of it, I sniggered to myself. Here we have a bunch of people who complain about the lack of money to buy fuel, and yet these are the same people who are free enough not to work on a weekday afternoon.

However, there was a picture I saw which pissed the fuck out of me.

This is as sickening as beggars who bring their kids along with them to beg. Look, asshole, if you choose to be a jobless leech, the least you could do is leave your kid at home and not USE her in a demonstration she knows NOTHING about. Certainly forcing her to hold a shitty banner does not score you any brownie points. Pathetic acts like these only goes to show the idiocy of the demonstrators.

What happens if the crowd suddenly goes unruly and there is a stampede? What happens if the FRU are forced to use water cannons or tear gas? Your kid gets hurt or killed, you blinking dipshit.

Post publication entry :

I think it extremely sad that a discussion about fuel hikes invariably led to government bashing and accusation of cronisms of all sorts. Of course, the racial issue just had to be brought up. Do say hello to those nice blokes at the AutoWorld forum - I particularly enjoyed a few compliments that some of them extended to me.

However, I amazed to learn that people weren't aggreived with the fuel hike. It was the government they were unhappy about. Suddenly, a discussion about the justification of the fuel hike turned into a bashing of all sorts. Apparently, my parents are government cronies because I support the hike, and I am 'rich' - because only cronies of the government get to be rich. And so, as a kind gesture to a particular recalcitrant 'adult', I would like to quote an excerpt of the wonderful book that is 'The Chinese Dilemma'. In fact, this applies to many of the whiners out there...

Yet, despite the NEP, or because of it, many Chinese have become rich beyond their wildest dreams. Yet these are some of the people who complain the loudest about discrimination. It is hard to convince the non-Malays (and I include the Indians in this designation) that in their case the NEP has not disadvantaged them. If you point out to a non-Malay top civil servant that he has done very well for himself he will say, "Ah, but I would have done even better if I were Malay." I once suggested to a non-Malay chief executive of a bank that his being Indian hadn't prevented him from reaching the top, and his answer was: "You know what I'd be doing if I were Malay? I'd be heading a bigger bank."

Do these people sincerely believe that they have been discriminated against on account of race? Or are they just saying so? I have earlier described some who have grounds for feeling genuinely disgruntled. Others find it convenient to blame discrimination rather than their own inadequacies when their achievements fall short of their aspirations. Still others are unsure, but are happy enough to fall in with the prevailing view. It is as tempting to plead an unfair disadvantage when you lose as it is to claim victory against all the odds when you win.

Quit yabbling about how the government has failed you. You aren't as POOR as you make yourself out to be. If you are reading this, you are reading it from a computer somewhere - probably with broadband. You are probably well-educated, and while you might not be rich, you certainly aren't poor. You seem to mention a lot of your sufferings - the inability to pay the bills and such, yet you are well off enough to own a computer and educated enough to know what is going on. Stop trying to make it out as if the government has failed the poor - it is your own selfish and hypocritical needs that you are clearly more concerned about.

Who are you actually kidding? The poor suffer from the price hikes!?? The 'poor' with their motorbikes and low fuel consumption? No, you are complaining because the government is 'taking' YOUR money and using it to help the poor. That is what you are really aggrieved about, isn't it?


Thursday, March 02, 2006

just a few suggestions

How about you guys just shut the fuck up already?

It's already been two fucking days since they raised the prices. Why the hell are you still babbling like kids in school bitching over some pissy teacher who gave you extra homework? We all know that the government is not going to lower the price just because you bitch more than a housewife with rabies. And we all know that despite all that price hike, you idiots are still going to go about your daily life. Just bite the dust dammit.

And another thing. Kids are not supposed to attempt to write social/political commentaries. I've explained it before. Most kids (and when I say kids, I mean idiots aged 18-25) don't know squat about the world, and hence are not qualified to give their shitty assed opinions about social policies. Know your limitations. You aren't Vincent Lau, because frankly, you guys can try till you drop dead but still won't be able to write a masterpiece like this. And for fucks sake, if you do want to try to make a fool of yourself, there are many better ways to go about it than to post your inane opinons which you based on inaccurate facts.

How about...if it is expensive to go out, you stay home and watch tv? Goddamit. It's like an AhBeng who wants to go to Sunway Lagoon but the entrance fee costs a bomb - so he fucking doesn't go there until he has enough money. So, if you morons think you are too poor to pay for petrol so that you can go out with your friends, well....stay home, save money then go out next day. I drive a car. I pay for my petrol. I have, like the rest of you, a shitty pay. What's the fucking difference?

Just now I bumped into one of the many such crap on PPS. Apparently, some people want to hold a protest in front of the KLCC on Friday at 2pm. So let me get this straight. Government raises the price of fuel. You ain't happy cause it stretches your wallet. No money, you say.

It's Friday. It's 2pm. If you are a Muslim, mosque just ended and you should be heading back to office. If you are not a Muslim, there's no excuse. You're supposed to be working you lazy bastards. Here's a suggestion you fucking idiots. How about you get a job like the rest of us? Maybe then you can afford the petrol.

*I haven't ranted like that in ages. My job isn't a stressful one. Really*

Update : I've read in a few places that people are opposed to the hike because of 'bad timing'. Pray tell me, any one of you fucking morons, when would it be 'GOOD TIMING' to raise the price and ask people for more money? Quite simply put, there will NEVER be a good time. However, things like this just MUST be done. So, shut your gap already. It is 1.57pm. I hope, by some divine intervention, the skies will open up within the next few minutes and start pouring over the jamooks standing outside KLCC.