Monday, April 09, 2007

idiots influencing idiots

Okay, so turns out that I had to be on the road again longer than expected. But all is well, for now I am really, really back to sitting my ass in one place for quite some time. I hope. Anyway, being away, I was again kept out of the loop by some apparently important matters.

Like how our ministers FINALLY caught wind of Jeremy Clarkson's opinion on the Perodua Kelisa. Although the headline of 'quality car' is very misleading, let us be sure on one thing.

Jeremy Clarkson is an idiot.

But what is more amusing is that people actually take him seriously. Truthfully, I don't really give a hoot about cars. I know I want a fast car, and an expensive one that looks awesome. Who doesn't? I know how an internal combustion engine works and anything basic that a mechanical engineer should know about cars. That is all I care to give a shit about. But I know a lot of people who think that just because they are men, it is automatically written into their DNA that they need to be interested in cars. Unfortunately, most of them know JACK SHITE but feel the need to prove their masculinity by acting interested. And verey unfortunately these morons refer to Jeremy Clarkson as the Holy Saviour and Top Gear as their Bible.

"How do you know that the Rover is a shitty car?"
"Because Jeremy Clarkson said so.."
"Awesome, matee........"


This reminded me of some bloke I met a few moons ago who had NEVER EVER watched a movie in the cinema before. But before you uppity urbanites start mocking this 'Jakun', you should perhaps know that there really isn't a branch of Golden Screen Cinemas in every kampung in Malaysia, hence it might be understandable that loads of people never had the chance to watch a movie in the dark room.

But therein lies the problem. See, because some other morons went around telling these people that bad things - naughty things happen in these large rooms where men and women are allowed to sit so closely to one another and that immoral things start happening when the light goes out. And in order to distance himself from things like that, this bloke bought pirated DVDs from the local AhBengs.

I am sure that his God would not have been pleased that his misguided and unchecked information would then lead to him breaking the law in purchasing those DVDs. Of course, back then, my sarcasm was kept in check because things like that could result in more idiots getting angry with me.

However, more recently, when I asked this other holy bloke to go clubbing, he replied that his priest said that such an activity was forbidden as many social vices happen in clubs. And so, this bloke doesn't drink or smoke, not because he feels that it is bad for his health, but because some old bloke in robes told him that he could not enter the promised land if he ever did things like that. He didn't go to clubs not because he didn't like the loud music, but because he was sure that estacy pills would be forced down his throat by Russian prostitutes high on Vodka Martinis.

"Have you ever been to a club before, then?"
"No, but I was told that improper stuff goes on in clubs"
"But if you have never seen someone pissed drunk, how do you tell the difference between drinking Shandy and Absinthe? Or if you have never seen what goes on on the dance floor, how do you decide what is proper when you have not seen the improper?!"

My advice?

Don't be an idiot. If you are going to have an opinion, don't follow blindly.


Oi Oi I love Top Gear. Well, not so much for the information inside. Of course we do get the 'on paper' specifications, but I don't take his opinion on cars seriously. Its more the entertainment value in it.

Why are they so worked up about a washed up porn star?

Oh wait, that's another Jeremy altogether.

Hmmm, maybe they mixed them up and thought the porn star was writing Car reviews...


joker, u're trying to say that in order to know things u have to experience it; u don't need to visit a ladies' restroom in order to know that u'd get into trouble do u?

"But if you have never seen someone pissed drunk, how do you tell the difference between drinking Shandy and Absinthe? Or if you have never seen what goes on on the dance floor, how do you decide what is proper when you have not seen the improper?!"

Okay, go try some rat poison n die, then come n blog it out saying, "Oooo... now i can differenciate between rat poison and my own gut juice. Oh, n i've also know what is life because i'm now dead."

Too late smartie, some things are best left unchallenged.


Because, you fucking moron, rat poison will kill you.

Absinthe, won't if you are clever about it.


LOL slapping yourself on d face; who told u that rat poison can kill u? some1 in a robe? Have u tried it?

Same goes here, u stupid moron, no one needs to see someone pissed drunk in order to tell d diff bet Shandy n Absinthe, my dog can tell u that, don't try to act like u're some kind of a philosopher; u're just not cut out for it.

just so u know, u're not worth me giving out my name; so dont bother touching about that annonimous thingy.


Rat poison will kill you. That much is universal. On the other hand, alcohol has very different effects on different people.

You're someone who obviously haven't had a drop of alcohol in your life, and you're pissed that I insulted your believes.

Too bad, go cry to your mama. Or the guy in robes. Whichever suits your jolly.

And it seems that you know me in person. A stranger on the street wouldn't bother adressing the anonymous issue. You are taking this personal. This is awesome for me, because it validates the fact that I can go around pissing everybody I meet online and in real life.


It's awesome for me too, to the fact that u know that ur reasoning can't go far n u've used ur last resort; that's to personally insult some1 rather than eating up ur own foot.

Yes, u may be right to the fact that alcohol does have very different effects on different people, but still, do u REALLY think u'd need to get wasted in order to know what's a shandy? D reason u keep arguing is just for the sake of arguing, for fun in other word.

Trust me, i've had alcohol n i know how it tasted like. Again, ur assumption has failed. N u're equally pissed off when i pointed out flaws in ur theory (refer to ur first reply)



Finally, a little bit of intelligence! You're right. I am pissed. Morons usually have that effect on me.



I'll let u know when i'll be reappearing, just in case u dont know which anonimous moron's currently stepping on ur tail.


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