Thursday, February 26, 2009


You know how Manyoo has been playing for the last few months? Where the other team just turns up to play the game, but aren't really interested....and then they get steamrolled by Manyoo? I was thinking how awesome that would be - how great it must feel to keep winning and winning easy. It must make you feel superior. It surely must make you feel awesome.

But it really doesn't.

I found out today how goddamn frustrating it must be to be in their shoes.

At work, there was a huge competition between two business divisions, where teams would need to do a presentation on a project they did or an innovative leadership talk of some sort. So there I was, so gung-ho about this whole thing, I spent a whole week preparing for the presentation. And I shit you not, I spent so much time preparing, I could speak better than Anwar Ibrahim (for all his bullshit and hypocrisy, credit where credit is due, that bloke can sell a ton of sand to a bedouin).

Then, I found out only on the day before the competition that I was the only contestant in that particular category. Everybody else had submitted their entries for the other two categories. Which meant I won by default. All I needed to do was turn up and I would win. Still, I told myself, fuck it, even if I win by default, I was going up there on stage, and leave no doubt in the audiences minds that I would deserve that victory, whether or not there was a challenger. I even tweaked a major part of the presentation the night before when I got a brainwave for what I should say.

As it turned out, I nailed the presentation. Yes, I was nervous in the beginning, but I managed to iron it out pretty quick. On a side note, Tiger Woods said yesterday, just before he played in his first tournament in 8 months that he was always nervous before every game. He went on to say that the day he stopped being nervous was the day he quit, because being nervous shows you care enough for it to matter.

At the end of the event today, where they announced the winner, I remember sitting in my seat feeling absolutely underwhelmed. It was not my fault nobody else submitted an entry in that particular category. Yes, I think I would have won even if somebody did take part. But it felt very, very hollow. I went on stage, collected my trophy, smiled for the camera and returned to my seat still feeling very underwhelmed.

Of all the awards, of all the trophies and of all the achievements I have had in my life, this one was supposed to be one of the most important, certainly the most important of my career, but it turned out to be the most hollow of them all. It meant nothing. Winner by default. Bah!

I did get an 8-gig pendrive for my efforts, though.


Sunday, February 15, 2009

say what?!

Filler post!

I know I want to write about something, but I just can't seem to find the mood to sit and type a long arsed serious post about the idiocy of increasing the gas subsidies again.

So, here are some random quotes compiled over the last few months. Some of them are my lines, some are from friends, while one of them from the old man which is too good to leave out. Today, I share with you, the ultimate wisdom of life...

"What is your life's objective?"
"I wanna travel the world."
"What for?"
"I want to have a conversation with people of all races and religion and prove that religion does more harm than good"

"Eh, my friend told me she used a tampon for the first time that day..."
"It's good to know I am still considered the subject matter expert in this area"
"She said it felt like having a tiny dick inside her while walking.."

"...and she's damn smart too"
"That's it?"
"Well, she's loaded la. Money is always a factor what"
"So, lemme get this straight - she's richer than you, hotter than you and smarter than you"
"Er, yeah"
"So what the fuck are you bringing to the table?"
"I love her"
"HAHAHA, fuck you man. Are you like 15?!? Love, is pretending to like eating the chicken neck and feet so that your kids can enjoy the good parts. Love, is taking the bus to work so that you can save up for her birthday present. Love, is spending your last dollar on a red rose so that you can see her smile. What you're saying is not love, it's MADNESS!"
"Oh no, wait.....the last one is pretty much the same thing"

"It's fucking fun man....it's like...smoking pot while watching Borat!"

"Jim Clancy last evening asked viewers to write in on whether their government/leaders are doing the right thing during this financial turmoil.

I thought for 2 seconds.

One each for BN and PR.

Lompat masuk (perangkap) boleh tapi lompat keluar tak sah!! He, he, he!


Sunday, February 08, 2009

chronology of failure

Engineer's log: Chronology of Failure

Friday, 6 February 2009

0430: Alarm sounded in the main control building. Strain gauge detected severe circumferential stresses in the Waste Water Filtration Casing, Unit A.

0435: Engineer ignored the alarm as it was suspected to be a slight upset in the process flow causing fatigue stress in the main support strut.

0450: Second alarm sounded in the main control building. A pressure gauge had shown excessive built up pressure in the frontal supply area, near the west side of the Waste Water Storage Tank. Engineer acknowledged the alarm this time as the pressure could not have been due to fatigue stress in the main support strut.

0530: The on-call mechanic took too long to respond to this Priority Level 1 incident and further disciplinary action shall be taken on this matter. Strain gauge and pressure gauge showed extremely high levels of stress and pressure. It was observed that these high readings is usually present only during the production and discharge of nanobots.

0550: On-call mechanic perform some troubleshooting checks on the system and diagnosed the problem as a calcification of foreign minerals in the filtration system, leading to clustering. Due to the size of the foreign particle cluster exceeding filtration media size, the filter media suffers breakthrough. Due to the breakthrough, the foreign particle is suspected to be lodged in the flexible hose connecting the Waste Waster Filtration Casing (Unit A) to the Waste Water Storage Tank, thus causing a blockage in flow, which then led to the build up in pressure. The on-call mechanic determines that he cannot proceed further, and recommends the Specialist Engineer perform a Non-Destructive Ultrasonic Test to confirm presence of the blockage. The on-call mechanic pumps suppressant chemicals into the system to reduce the effect of pressure build-up.

0600: Filtration system pressure is maintained at dangerously high levels. Most major equipments are put on standby mode to reduce stress on the overall system.

0930: Specialist Engineer (SE) arrives, but work cannot commence due to administrative red tape and bureaucratic procedures.

1100: SE starts troubleshooting the system distress. SE performs the Non-Destructive Ultrasonic Test and confirms the on-call mechanic's diagnosis of the presence of a foreign object blockage. SE requests a Full Computed Tomograph Scan of the system to determine the exact location of the blockage and to determine the next course of action.

1130: Owner's Engineer decides that depending on the results of the Full Computed Tomograph Scan, a major overhaul of the filtration system maybe required. As such, the Owner's Engineer decides to postpone the scan and bring in his preferred crew to do the job.

1300: Flow throughout the system fluctuates. Pressure fluctuates between safe levels and dangerous levels.

1630: Owner's Engineer preferred crew arrives on-scene and takes over based on the morning report. This new SE disagrees with some of the recommendations made by the morning SE. However, he proceeds with the Full Computed Tomograph Scan of the system.

1800: The system does not suffer further pressure fluctuations and is put on partial standby for the remainder of the day. The SE shall review the test results in the morning and decide on the next course of action. It was also ordered that the main system be put on standby at midnight to prepare for overhauling works the next day. Neither fluids nor solids are to be pumped in to the system at all costs.

-End of Day 1 report-


Wednesday, February 04, 2009

there's a time and place...

...for everything.

There is a time and place for playing, and there is a time and place for working.

There certainly is a time for politicking and there is a time for getting your hands dirty.


It's been one fucking year. You won some, you lost some. The economy is in piss poor shape. People are getting retrenched everyday. There is a stimulus package you are supposed to be working on. Don't you have the two richest states to govern? All of you. Will you assholes get back to work already?

Nobody believed me when I told them that both these idiots will drive our country to the ground. Pakatan and BN? Different lie, same bullshit. Why aren't there stronger leaders out there? Why aren't there leaders who knows what their priorities are?

One fella spends one whole year talking about these damn takeovers. The other fella spends one whole year talking about how immoral it is. And suddenly, in one day, it's padan muka one fella and goddamn you hypocrite to the other guy.

It's frustrating, it really is. One year of comics and circus acts.

It really is enough.

A couple of weeks ago, when I told you (and my friends) the UMNO jahat story, most people laughed at it. One of the comments said it was 'absolutely wonderful'. You know, when I first heard those words uttered, I laughed to myself. Because it was funny.

But then if you think about it a little longer, like I did, suddenly it didn't seem so funny after all. For the record, he really didn't let her get the red watch. The more I thought about it, the more disgusted I was that a parent could instill such hatred upon a 5 year old kid who doesn't understand any of this stuff.

I told my colleague that story the other day and he was actually surprised that I never knew things like that was common in this Hicktown. Apparently even the tadikas are heavily influenced by political parties and kids are brainwashed from a young age to hate certain political parties and of course, the politicians affiliated to those parties.

Some democracy we live in, huh?

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